When life gives way to uncertainty, it is only natural to ask why. My confidence has taken a hit in the past few weeks. The great certainty in my path and purpose that came so effortlessly such a short time ago has been tested. It seems my path is once again a series of plans being crossed out and replaced on the way to some hoped for future that grows more distant at every glance. That alone is reason to struggle, but it is not the first time I’ve faced circumstances like these. So I wondered why, this time, I feel the doubts so strongly. One thing in particular struck me as I pondered.
I feel alone.
What I feel I’ve lost is the consistent presence of people who share the same vision. People who are working alongside me to accomplish that vision. I realize there are some who can give themselves to a cause, and whether alone or in the company of others, bring it to pass. I don’t think I’ve ever been one of those people. Without someone to share the road with me, I stumble and struggle not to lose heart. I need others. I am hungry for a community of people who share a vision and a purpose in this thing called life. A community of people who have things in common. I don’t fully know what that looks like yet, but I’m going to continue the search.